Thursday, 22 November 2012

God's Goodness shall follow me....

21st November 2012

Dear All,

I would like to share with you one of my favourite  scripture.

Psalm 23:6 "Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

What an inspiring Word of God, that has taken root in the very depth of my heart. What, assurance of His goodness that will follow (track) me down and overtake me.

That is the power of God's love. He loves me so much, that He will never let me go. His love, not only forgives my every sin but also forgets it .

 Instead He says He will look for me ( the lost sheep) who was once in his fold and went astray, and gather me in His house to dwell forever.

Wow! What an amazing God we have. 

Many years ago, my husband and I used Psalm 23 to pray our family prayers. I use to say the psalm without having an understanding of what it meant. 

Yet God used our little commitment to our prayer to mold us into the sheep that can now, hear the master's voice. 

His Word is alive and it will take root in our lives at the right time, for His Word will never go void. Only now I have began to understand the real meaning of this truth.

Our God is a good God. He stands on His Word. When we confess His Word, His Word must become alive in our life.

Just like the centurion who understood this principal in Matthew 8:8 " Lord I am not worthy that You should come under my roof. But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed." Jesus had marveled at his understanding.

We may wonder, why, we do not see the fullness of His Word in our lives. The Key reason is BELIEVE. Just like the centurion.

When we confess with our mouth, it is only an action of the body. 

The body needs to listen to the Spirit of Jesus (new creation) in us  and BELIEVE in our heart by the supernatural faith that His goodness will follow me. 

 When we exercise this truth by faith ,  immediately the invincible supernatural goodness of God is released in our life.

2 Corinthians 4: 18 " While we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal." 

It is written in 2 Corinthians 5:7 " For we walk by faith, not by sight."

I took nearly 35 years to comprehend this truth. Why do I say that? 

I thought, when I said with faith, I will receive what I confessed.

 The truth is, there is a devil, that comes to rob and steal our blood bought right to His goodness. How does he do that? The battle is in our mind.

Our first thought is God's goodness (promises).

 Our second thought is controlled by our circumstances. The devil uses our circumstances.

Our present circumstances will tell, we are not enjoying God's goodness and nothing seems to be working out and thus, rob our believe in God. Some examples:

1) financial lack (going from pay check to pay check)
2) family relationship issues
3) problems at work 
4) Personal desires not met
5) problems in our ministry
6) sickness

Jesus knew we, on our own effort, will not be able to enjoy His goodness that He promised.

Therefore He has given us a rescue plan. What is that? He made me think this way.

Circumstances are only facts, that can change. TRUTH cannot change. 

What is that TRUTH?

Jesus has taken all my sorrows, pain, lack, stress, hurts, torments, sickness, and all my sins on himself 2000 years ago. His BLOOD has overcome every battle.

He has won every battle, I have to face, here on earth.  He laid His life for me as it is written in  John 10:11, " I am the good Shepherd; the good Shepherd giveth His life for the sheep."

Who is His "sheep."  I am His sheep (a believer) who is a sinner and was lost.

This is what He has revealed to me. When Jesus died on the cross, He redeemed me by His blood into a life that is manifested in His glory here on earth. What is that life?

John10:10 " I have come they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly."

For poverty ( spiritual and temporal) He has given me riches here on earth and heaven.
For sickness He has given me health. He has given me His Love that can cast out all fear.

In psalm 23 : 1-3 " The lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters; He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake"

When I believe and confess this scripture everyday,  I realise that Jesus actually gives me rest. Let me explain.

When I believe that Jesus has won every difficult situation (2000 years ago) in my life and speak His word over the problem, I receive His supernatural peace that surpasses all understanding. I am set free from anxiety  and fear.

The next thought I receive from the Holy Spirit is that my problem is already solved by Jesus and I look forward to seeing the unfolding of this truth with expectations. Hence " He restores my soul" is fulfilled. I now have the mind of Christ.

It is this continuous decreeing of His word on my life  that defeats the devil from planting the second thought that is negative. 

It is this continuous confessing of His Word that " leads me in the paths of righteousness for His glory"

It is in this continuous confessing of His Word, His righteousness that leads me to obedience  to walk in humility and wait for the acceptable time.

It is in this continuous confessing of His Word, in faith that leads me to hope to see the goodness of God in my life.

It is this continuous confessing of His Word in faith and hope that makes me rise above my current circumstances by refusing to be controlled by what I see and experience and believe that, He supplies my every need (phil 4:19) and there is no want.

It is this continuous confessing in faith and hope, that leads me to visualise the invincible (unseen) and do the impossible through His Wisdom. 

Finally it is this continuous confessing in faith and  hope that leads me to my rest.

It is when I am resting in His goodness, I will remember, I have stopped struggling and started claiming with the power of the Holy Spirit, His promises as if I have received. As it is written in Ezekiel, calling those things that are not as if they are.

It is when I am resting, I will recall how my Shepherd picked me up and walked me through the many difficult trials and tribulations, nursing my wounded soul.

As He walked, carrying me close to His bosom, I recall how safe He made me feel. His Love was sufficient for me. He filled my heart with joy. His love is my oil of gladness that overflows.

It is when I am resting in Him, I now see His goodness ( His Blessings) and Mercy ( His long suffering and forgiveness) following me, as a loving Father, everyday never leaving my sight.

In my resting place I see a tender loving God who has taken a personal interest to correct every wrong thing in my life by hearkening His angels to set me on a platform for success for my life. 

Psalm 103:20 " Bless the Lord, you His angels, Who excel in strength, who do His Word, heeding the voice of His Word."

Like the shepherd who pulls out the lost sheep caught in a thorny bush and lay in a safe place.

Now that I have tasted His goodness, I will boldly confess " I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever and ever" for He is my resting place. 

With gratitude in my heart, for not giving up on me, I want to Praise my Father in Heaven with this Psalm 103

     "Bless the Lord, O my soul;
       And all that is within me, bless His holy name!
       Bless the Lord, O my soul,
       And forget not all His benefits;
       Who forgives all your iniquities,
       Who heals all your diseases,
       Who redeems your life from destruction,
       Who crowns you with loving kindness and 
        tender mercies "

God Bless 

Monday, 12 November 2012

Abundant Blessings

8th November 2012

Dear all

Today I would like to share with you one of my favourite scriptures that has impacted me so much in recent years.

Proverbs 10:22 " The blessings of the Lord makes one rich, And He adds no sorrow with it."

What do I understand through this scripture?

When you listen to the voice of God, and do what He commands of us as His children, His blessings without sorrow will reign upon us. Spiritual blessings (hear God In your heart) physical blessings (health) and material blessings.

 In Joshua 1:8 He has revealed " This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success."

Obedience is the cornerstone to our faith in God. Men of faith like Abraham, Issac, Jacob, Moses, David, who listened to the voice of God received countless blessings.

Numerous times in the scriptures the Lord has shown us examples of  people of God who fell out of favour from God because of disobedience.

Our first parents , who were made perfect and clothed in the glory of God,  had every blessings without sorrow but lost the Glory of God when they disobeyed. As a result, they were cast out from the Garden of Eden and had to toil for their provisions.

Ever since, because of the sin of Adam and Eve, man toiled with sweat for his livelihood. The world system today shows a man has to toil, morning till dusk to earn for a decent livelihood.

This is the cycle to misery as result of listening to the voice of the devil. Man has lost his peace of mind, because he is constantly driven to work harder because of fear of lack and the desire for more.

It is a very viscous cycle, schemed up by the devil to keep man constantly preoccupied with the vanities of this world in which a confortable ground for Pride, Self-sufficiency and power is sown.

He traps you first by thinking that you need to work hard to provide for the family. Next he waves the carrot of progress to attract you to take more responsibilities for a better position in your job, so that you can provide a better life for your family.

Next he seeks for recognition and acceptance from his family and society. Progressively man starts thinking He deserves better. He is never satisfied and he becomes restless. He wants more.

Man is actually seeking for God for He was made by God for Him. It was for this reason St augustine wrote that a man's heart is restless unless He rest in the Lord. We can only be complete when we rest in Him. If we choose to ignore this truth, we will be chasing after clouds aimlessly.

As a result man becomes competitive, jealous, proud, selfish, envious and fearful. He is constantly trying to prove to himself and others that he knows better and deserves a better life. Never contented.

I must admit I have allowed myself to get caught in this vicious trap the devil had laid for me.
Let me explain.  

When I first started in the Insurance line, my only intention was to earn a descent amount to provide for my husband and myself.

When I discovered I was good at what I was doing and was being noticed and given the recognition, I became ambitious and, began to apply pressure on myself to keep the good image. Even when I was improving every year I was not satisfied. I had put higher goals. I was always in the rush. I was always very tired and anxious.

Where was God in all this? I don't remember consulting with him about my work. I thought if I worked hard, He will bless me. I worked all day in the field and several hours at night to do my paper work.
I was constantly trying to impress myself and my superiors and my family that I am good at my work.

I was never happy with what I had achieved. I always thought I should have done better. Even though everything on the outside looked I was doing very well, I felt there was something missing within me. I had no peace of mind and ended constantly striving to reach for something better.

Little did I know know that, it was during these times, I used my busyness, to keep me distracted from my sadness that was lurking in my home due to my husband's illness and my loneliness.

The more the sorrow the more I worked harder in my work to fill the void. I justified my long working hours to earn a good income for our livelihood.

Even though I gradually managed to replace the income that my husband lost due to his illness, there was still no peace in my heart.

Why do I say that? When I was tired, I often caught myself thinking, how unfair life has been for me.
Many questions will run through my mind. (murmurings)

Why has this happened to me?

Why do I have to start working at the late age of 50 with an energy of a 30 year old?

Why am I not enjoying like other senior couples, going for holidays and growing old gracefully during our retirement years.

Why must my husband fall sick? Why? Why? Why? If only things could have been different........

Deep down I was wallowing in self pity, how life should have been,  so many regrets. I was always looking back.

There was no joy. During those years I had put on several masks to hide my deep deep sorrows.

It was at this time In late 2008, when I was at my lowest point of endurance, I had decided to attend an on going Christian Discipleship School.

Nothing happened within me during the first year, as I was only going through the motions of a student in a class that taught me the steps of a disciple of Christ.

In august 2009, I decided to take a 2 weeks break from all the hard work and sorrows at home and spend  a quiet time by myself in my sister's house in Australia.

I believe, God was so gracious to me, to grant me the rest I needed mentally and for my physical body. I came home with a refreshed mind.

 I returned just on time to attend a 3 days christian seminar and the topic that was so timely was " Total Restoration"

It was this seminar that changed my life and I have never been the same since, for I had enbarked on a journey to restore my life with God's help. God in this seminar opened my eyes. He made me realise that I was going in circles. Pretty much like a " dog trying to catch its own tail"

Why do I say that?

I was looking for peace, self fulfilment, in the wrong places.

 I realised, though having a job that provides a good income is good and these are also channels  provided by God for my well being,  it was only good for that sole purpose. The Job by itself cannot give me an everlasting Joy.

 What if for whatever reason, I did not have this job, will my happiness cease? Will I panic? Is my self worth measured by the position I hold and the income I receive?

I came to understand that the cravings from my carnal nature that made me to strive to receive more out of my job was actually a misplaced joy. I had justified myself to think, the more the merrier.

I saw how the devil had led me to think that my success depended on me striving day and night for my happiness to have a secure future thus resulting in a stressful live.

I even thought that, since the responsibility for providing for myself and my husband depended now solely on me, I should put that as my number one priority as I was running out of time as my body clock was ticking away.

The Holy Spirit patiently showed me, over a period of time how my career became my God.

 He revealed to me, how much I had moved away from Him. How I have allowed FEAR of FAILURE to be the platform for my motivation to succeed. Fear of having less drove me to earn more. He revealed to me how the devil had robbed my Joy.

John 10:10 " The thief does not come except to steal (my joy,my health, my peace) and kill, and to destroy."

He showed how many times in the earlier years of my financial crises, I had cried to Him for help.

God had answered me, by opening this door in the insurance line.

Yet when I was doing very well, I made my career as the main Goal for my happiness and God was a means for achieving it.

 I spent very little time with God. A quick prayer in the morning and a quick prayer at night. I did it out of guilt almost as if I was doing God a favour.  He didn't need me. I needed Him.

Until that point my prayers were "bless me prayers" and "help me prayers". How sad and disappointed
God must have been with me. Yet He continued loving me. Why do I say that?

 God was trying to get my attention to help me, through various circumstances, but I was too caught up with the noises of the world and its attractions and could not hear Him.

 Instead I had turned Him into a dispensing machine. God forgive me. Protect me Jesus from going back to that place of strive.

Holy Spirit showed me that, when I switched mode, from earning to meet my daily needs, to seeking for vain glories for self gratification, I had lost my peace. Fear had masked itself under these vain glories.

Once again I was looking for freedom and a life filled with Joy, as I mentioned earlier, pretty much like the " dog trying to catch his own tail."

As I write this, it brings to my mind the mistakes, our forefathers in the scriptures, made, were very similar to mine. An action that stemmed from ingratitude and pride.

Moses led the people of God ( Israelites ) from slavery to freedom, from the land of Egypt. Yet they had forgotten God's mercy and love and started murmuring, and disobeyed God by worshipping other Gods.

 As result, they suffered much and it took them 40 years to come to a realisation before they could enter the promised land.

 While Moses was spending time with God on the mountain for one month, listening to God, so as to know the next course of action for God's people, the people became restless in the valley.

 Instead of turning to God by being quiet and stilling their minds and waiting for God's timing, they gave into their  restless cravings of the flesh, and hence  the birth of the " golden calf "

 How often we have done the same thing. We become restless, when our mind is constantly tormented to do something to make us happy. To fill some vacuum in our life.

These times we tell God what we want for ourselves, we tell God what we want for others, for their good and God to rubber stamp it.

Why do we behave this way?

I have come to understand, that, because of our fallen sinful nature, we are always trying to be like " God" making decisions that is stemmed from the seed of pride, that, we know better, what is good for us and what will make us happy and thus we too start to build many "golden calfs" and sin.

We don't have to live like this any more. Instead Jesus has given us a rescue plan. A life of blessings where sorrow is not added to it.

When we trust in Him and believe that through His death on the cross, He has wiped out the death of the flesh (sting of our fallen nature), and that we are now living in His spirit in our mortal bodies, we can  today actually enjoy all blessings promised in the scriptures.

He has promised in John 10:10 " I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." This promise is here on earth for all to enjoy.

But blessings come with conditions that need to be met. What is that condition?

Now that we have accepted Him as lord and saviour of our life and believe His spirit is in us, we need to abide in Him.

It is written John 15:3-4 " You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me."

How do we abide in Him?  By loving God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your strength.

How do we love God with all our heart?

By obeying Joshua 1:8 " This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success."

We need to have the heart of David, who was quick to repent when He sinned and seeked for God's mercy. Psalm 51 is the fruit of a repentant heart.That way he was clothed with the robe of humility. God forgave him and called him a man after my heart.

God loves us so much that He has already forgiven us when He died on the cross 2000 years ago.

 But in order to fully enjoy the life He has promised us we need to believe and  accept Him and his forgiveness and thus inherit this spirit filled life here on earth. We don't have to earn our way to Heaven or be merited with blessings by anything we do, to deserve it.

 No sin of ours can seperate us from Him for Jesus has restored us as His kingdom children through a blood bought covenant.

We need to everyday, as it is written in Joshua 1:8, check our walk with the Word of God, with His spirit convicting us ( God talking to us in our hearts) , then our way will be prosperous and with success.

When we start living everyday conscious of His presence in us and our thinking is aligned with His ways, our walk will become Christ like.

As we confess His life giving Word over our life, and allow His Word to wash us everyday by convicting us to abide in him He becomes the Word in us and thus the " Word became flesh "  is fulfilled in our life. His Word will not come back void for it is written " Heaven and Earth will pass away but my word will not pass away until it is fullfilled."

What a Divine Exchange. Jesus has restored what was lost in  the Garden of Eden.

The Glory of God is now upon us as it is written in 2 corinth 4:7 " But we have this treasure( Jesus in us) in earthen vessels (our human body) that excellance of the power may be of God and not of us."

Today after 3 years of meditating on His Word and progressively walking in his step as His disciple, I will boast in His glory that indeed He has filled my heart with His supernatural Joy, Peace and Love.

Though the world might say, what have you accomplished according to world's standard of success,  they can only boast of perishable treasures of this world.

I will say, my Joy is everlasting and it comes from God and it cannot be explained but only experienced and understood by those who eat from this Tree of Life ( Jesus) and I will wait with an expectent faith for the unfolding of the fullness of His blessings  (abundant life) in his time, here on Earth and in the Heavens when I breathe my last breath.

I am grateful to God for giving me a life that I now know, is complete in Him here on Earth ( temporary existance) and in a permanant home in Heaven.

Colossians 2: 9-10 " For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily ( Father, Son and Holy Spirit) and you are complete in Him, who is the Head of all principality and power.

I pray God for everyone who is reading my blog will also be blessed with the unveiling of this truth of an abundant life in Christ.

God Bless

Wednesday, 7 November 2012

A prisoner of Hope

7th November 2012

Dear All

Today I meditated on this scripture Zechariah 9:12 " Return to the stronghold, You prisoners of Hope. Even today I declare That I will restore double to you."

Today I will boldly declare that I am a prisoner of Hope.

I would like to share with you, how I became a prisoner of Hope.

All my life, I thought, to be a good christian, I must go to church every Sunday, say my prayers, be good, be a responsible person and do my best. 

When I got married, I thought, I will do everything that will make my husband happy.
That I will put his interest above mine, so that he will think well of me and will always love me.

My husband was very pleased with me and we had a good marriage. My husband made me feel that I was the best thing that happened to him. 

He in return became my hero, who provided my every need for a good life. He worked so hard to provide the best for me and the children. Yes he too put the interest of his wife and children above him.

God be praised for granting me such a blessed man in my life.

I thought nothing can go wrong. After all both of us were doing our best, everything according to our understanding, what was pleasing to Him.

How wrong we were? What happened?

27 years of marriage went on smoothly until tragedy stricked. My husband was diagnosed with prostrate cancer in the year 2000.

When he was diagnosed with prostrate cancer, his whole world fell apart and he was gripped with fear. 

Even though, he was third stage of his illness, the doctors had assured us that he will recover. There was hope for a full recovery. 

He did recover fully in 2005. 

He did not believe and he resigned in his mind that his life was over and that he will die and so he gave up hope.

Thus he became very sad, angry, resentful, bitter and looked at everything as hopeless until the day he died on 14th November 2011.

What has this sad story got to do with hope? Let me explain.

By the grace of God, I believed in my heart, God will not let us down and so I had hoped in His healing.

For 11 years I had prayed, prayed, prayed that God will restore my husband into the person he was.

For 11 years I had missed my husband , the hero of 27 years who was loving, kind, and fun to be with.

Many nights were spent in tears only to pick up myself the next morning with His strength and hope that God will make all things come together for good. Rom 8:28.

I believed so much in my heart that hope always prevails. It is written in Rom 5:5 " Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us."

Though I placed my trust in God, I had allowed myself countless times to be gripped by fear and hopelessness in my moments of weakness. It was during these shameful moments, that I acted in the flesh by being angry with my husband for not fighting back, all the negative thoughts that was tomenting him in his mind.

I wanted him to be positive like me. I wanted him to know that, he was not the only one who was suffering. I am in the same boat with him. He was not alone. I desperately wanted him to believe that we can get out of this fury storm. 

 8 years went by with my futile attempts of convincing him to snap out of the negativity he had clothed himself. I felt I was being choked into a life of darkness and hopelessness.

In my desperation, I turned to the Lord, for help. When the lord saw that I had quit depending on my knowledge of how things ought to be, because I deserved better,  He started speaking into my heart.

The Lord showed me in 2009 that I can do nothing on my own, to change my husband into believing in God's help. Why do I say that?

The Lord had showed me that, the reason I wanted my husband to get well, with God's help, was because I had a personal agenda. That is, my happiness depended on him getting well and be the hero of my life again.

He showed me, I needed to depend on Him. That my happiness does not depend on anyone, not even myself. 

 Nobody owed me anything for my goodness. For every act of goodness comes from Him. I own nothing, for everything is His.

 I used to think otherwise, that because I was good to my husband, I deserved to be happy.

Holy Spirit showed me that only God can make me happy, by living in his fullness of His love. 

Instead the Lord showed me how I can hope in Him and conduct myself in my walk, to live hopefully.

He showed me how to accept the things I cannot change, but still hope that God can make all things come together for good for His greater glory.

He taught me to love my husband unconditionally, without expecting anything( the hero image) and continue to love the person he had become. 

The Lord taught me not to lean on my understanding, of what will make me happy, but to lean on His understanding even though I did not know what it was then,

The Lord taught me to take His Love in Rom 5:5 "love of God has been poured into our hearts" and fill the void in my heart.

The Lord taught me to pray ceaselessly as it is written in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17 " Rejoice always and pray without ceasing". As a result, I decided to be happy no matter what my circumstances looked like.

The Lord taught me to put on the helmet of hope as it is written in 1 Thessalonians 5:8 "But let who are of the day be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet the hope of salvation." (liberty)

The Lord taught me to do everything for Him by offering everything (my pain, my disappointment, my loneliness,) to Him as He did for me on the cross.

The Lord taught me to bear everything with His love as it is written in
 Colossians 3:12-14 " Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, if another has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave, so you must do. But above all these things put on love which is the bond of perfection."

What did I gain after 3 years of waiting in hope for my husband to get well?

In 3 years, God had used my husband's health condition to mold me into the person of His making.

He used the weakness of that wonderful man to tranform me into the likeness of Christ.

I saw the hand of God in my life, using my husband's life, like a light, in a candle (his body) melting away like the wax  to mold me.

That light was Jesus in my husband who allowed his creature (my husband) to reject His hope, yet continued living in him, so that He can become the anchor of hope for me as it is written in the scriptures.

Heb 6: 19 " This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, which enters behind the veil."

It is this hope, that became my strength and my joy. Holy Spirit taught me to be strong in Him. That nothing can separate me from His love. 

The death of my husband could not separate me from His Love which had taken root in my heart and filled my every void.

Even though I had hoped so much for my husband to survive this trial, God had given me His heart to be courageous and have the grace to accept the things I cannot change, but to submit to His will. I thank God that indeed, His grace is sufficient for me.   

I now could identify the death of Jesus to the death of my husband. He took every infirmity, every fear, every lack, every pain of my husband to mold me into a person of Hope.

Now I can praise God with gratitude in my heart, and rejoice that His Word in Heb 3:6 " but Christ as a Son over His own house, whose house(temple of the Holy Spirit) we are if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm to the end" has been fulfilled in my life."

Therefore as a prisoner of Hope, I will claim Zechariah 9:12 that even Today God will restore everything Double.

It is my prayer that whoever reads this testimony will be inspired by His Word and turn their eyes to Him with the gift of Hope in their hearts.

God Bless

Monday, 5 November 2012

Great expectations

5th November 2012

Dear All

I wish to share with you one of my favourite scripture that has impacted my life since 2009.

2 Corinthian 3:18 " But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, as by the Spirit of the Lord."

I had great expectations from this scripture. Why do I say that?

I thought when I confessed His Word upon my life everyday with faith, something spiritual will happen to me and I will be transformed in His likeness and walk in His glory and all my pressing issues of my life will finally be resolved.

For 2 years I pressed on with faith confessing this scripture. What happened?

Something did happen, but to my surprise, not in the way I had expected.

The problems I had, only got worst. Many nights were spent pouring my heart to the Lord, with tears as my companion.

The only consolation I had was the assurance that the Lord will never forsake me and He will deliver me.

As I persevered, with faith and hope, I realised something was happening, not in my circumstances, but within me.

God in His most gentle way, revealed to me my weaknesses. He revealed to me my sins that was hindering me from walking " in His likeness, from glory to glory"

He revealed to me that if I want to walk in His likeness, I needed to bury my old sinful nature in His death and by faith rise as Christ was raised from the dead, and live in the spirit of God.

Rom 6 : 4-5 " Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in the newness of life"

I realised that He needed me to cooperate with Him to "walk from glory to glory"

What kind of cooperation was God expecting from me?

To surrender myself completely to Him. Surrender my will. Surrender my dreams. Surrender my hopes.

To put to death my expectations on people to make me happy.

To put to death my expectations on material things to make me happy.

To put to death my expectations on myself ( achievements) to make me happy.

To put to death my ideas of how God is going to use me for his glory.

To put to death all my past vain glories as mine and putting off the mindset that I deserved better, a successful life that was achieved through strive (flesh) that, which was the fruit of fear of failure.

Thus this scripture, Rom 6:6 " knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin (flesh) might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin " started to take root into my heart.

Hence by the grace of God, I received his peace that surpassed all human understanding.

The Lord impressed into my heart that He wants me to expect Him to be the One who can give me the life that is rich in His Love, His Peace, His Joy.

That my security is in Him.

That He is my God who will supply all my needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.
Phil 4:19

Thus the Holy spirit started to teach me everything. Everytime I faced a difficult situation, I ran to Him for his wisdom.

Most of the time He would tell me to zeb my mouth from confessing the wrong thing and instead to praise him for what I was going through.

Though it was the hardest thing for me to do, as everything in my oldself in the flesh was screaming out to me, to react, especially when I was  hurt or gripped with fear, instead, I conformed to the prompting of the Holy Spirit in my heart by praising Him with tears rolling down my eyes.

It is then I realised the truth of this scripture in Isaiah 40:31 " But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles; They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint."

What a revelation this scripture is in my life. Praise God! What strength He has bestowed in my life. If not for His strength I would have been perished into a world of darkness, clothed with fear, anxiety,  sadness and despair.

It was His strength that helped me to become energised to withstand any trial I had to face.

The awareness of His presence gave me the confidence that I am never alone.

 He assures once again in Isaiah 30:15 " In returning and rest you shall be saved; In quietness and confidence shall be your strength."

It was then I realised what, 2 Corth 3:18 meant. What is that?

When I confess in faith, I live in the spirit of Christ, I begin to walk with unveiled face, I am  actually free from the bondage of sin.

Therefore the Word in 2 Corth 3:17 " Now the lord is the spirit; and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty." comes alive in me and sets me free from bondage of negative strongholds of sin caused from fruits of fear.

Every kind of strive of the flesh is put to death.

My futile attempt of using my own human effort( strive) to become like Jesus is put to death.
He becomes my righteousness. I am already made right in Him.

Infact every victory is derived from saying " No" to the flesh, and inturn " are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the spirit of God" comes alive.

 I saw in my spirit that each time I died in the flesh and overcame my weakness in His strength, I was being transformed into the same image ( in Christ) and every step of victory over the flesh,  was going from glory to glory.

Eventhough, I have disappointed the Holy Spirit, and at times I have fallen short of His glory, by giving in to the flesh and subject myself to strive, I am encouraged by the Holy Spirit to trust in His Word that nothing can seperate me from His Love (no sin) .  Everytime I repent I have the assurance of His forgiveness.

His Word that Mercy (Jesus on the cross) triumphs judgement gives me the understanding that He has paid the prize for my sin and has already washed me as white as snow with His Blood.

That this life He has given me, is to live in expectation that He wants to do something wonderful for me.

That is the good news of salvation for me. Read Isaiah 61:1-8 .
I am encouraged in this scripture that when I conform to His ways by living as His witness He will recompense me with double honor.(verse 7-8).

I thank God for His exceeding grace He has showered upon me as it is written in  Ephesians 3:20, without which it would have been virtually impossible for me to share with you such profound truths of His glory in my life. God be praised.

It is my prayer that whoever reads this testimony will be blessed through His living Word which He has revealed to me through His Love and Mercy.

God Bless

Sunday, 4 November 2012

The scales have dropped

Today I would like to share with you one of my favourite scriptures that I have so often confessed and meditated upon.

Galatians 2:20 “ I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but 
Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

When I first came across this scripture I believed it without understanding 
what it really meant. Gradually the Word was taking root in my heart.

I began to understand, that to claim Christ lives in me, I needed to put to death 
everything that was offending God.

At first I thought I didn’t really offend God. I thought I was very good.

In fact I thought it is the other “ people” who are always in the wrong.

Gradually the scales from my eyes started dropping little by little, only to 
reveal that I have offended God. This is what He showed me.

God showed me that I had anger in me. I had bitterness in my heart. I never 
tried to forget what hurts, people have caused me. I had unforgiveness in me. I had resentment. I was judgemental.( used my measurement of right and wrong). I took offence to what people did to me and reacted indifferently. My reactions were all based on their past record of bad behaviour.

All my life I wanted to please God, without knowing that I had so much of 
garbage inside me that was hindering God to work in me.

How I must have grieved the Holy spirit all that time.

It is written very clearly in Ephesians 4:29 “ Let no corrupt word proceed out 
of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers”

How often when we are hurt, we keep talking and talking and talking endlessly 
to everyone to receive some sort of justification for our broken heart.

We use our mouth to poison another to clear our “good” name.

What happens when we do that?

A broken heart, is a sad heart that does not forgive and becomes angry 
and bitter, thus leading itself to resentment. Then it becomes suspicious of everything, that the other person does. I realised, this is the trap that Satan has laid for us, to create in us a negative stronghold.

This is what I have discovered. Satan traps us by making us take offence, 
whenever things don’t go our way. We think it is because we are so good, and this or that should not have happened to us. But, what really makes us take offence. PRIDE

Pride derives from our self-centredness. We secretly think we are better than 
others, and we cannot be made to feel small in any situation.

Guess who is the Father of Pride. Lucifer fell because of pride. He wanted to be 
like God and he thought he knew more than God.

What a dangerous line to thread on.

Ephesians 4:30 “ And do not grieve the Holy spirit of God, by whom you were 
sealed for the day of redemption.”

How many times I must have grieved the Holy spirit during all those years. My body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit. I realised I was no different to the 
pharisees who Jesus had accused, for desecrating His Father’s House. God forgive me.

Ephesians 4:31-32 “ Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour, and evil speaking 
be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”

I have made a decision not to hurt the Holy spirit. When I made this decision in 
2009, I was set free and God saved me and He had put His smile on my face.

The Holy Spirit became my partner in my Love Walk. I now know in my heart 
that as I mature into the likeness of Christ in my love walk , everyday , I have by His grace brought a smile on Jesus face.

Everyday with confidence in the free gift of Faith I have received and by the 
grace of God I can now boldly declare and claim 2 Corinthians 3:18 “ But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image (likeness of Christ) from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord"                                                                                                                                                                             

What a wonderful, merciful, loving God we have. He knows we cannot be 
anything like Him, so He gave us His spirit to live in our body (unclean temple) to be made worthy and acceptable to the Father.

Thank you Jesus for counting us worthy to receive your love in our hearts.

I pray that all of us become “Christ in us” so that Jesus can so proudly present 
us as His unblemished bride to his Father, saying “ Father it was worth shedding every drop of my blood for these little ones”

God Bless

We are saints

Dear all,

I wish to share with you my thoughts on the good news that we are God’s saints.

It is written in 1 Peter 2:9 “ But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.”

Isn’t it wonderful to know that we are God’s royal priesthood ( Saints). Praise God!!

It is great to know this, but I recall some thoughts I had before I said Yes.

Do I want to be His saint?

Do I know what I am saying “ Yes” to when I accept this gift of being “ His People”

To be honest with you, I said “Yes” without really knowing what I was getting into.

We have a very intelligent God who knows everything about us. Infact He knows us better than we do of ourselves.

I believe, when I gave myself to Him on September 18th 2009, He took me on my word and God grabbed hold of me and refused to let me go.

I thought things in my life would improve, my home situation would change, my financial situation would change, and I would become this successful individual when I said “Yes”. Saying yes to Matt 6:33 “ Seek ye the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness and all things shall be added onto you.”

Why do I say God grabbed hold of me?

He knew better than me, what I have brought myself against. He knew, now all the devils will comeout from their hiding places to discourage me. He knew, they will toment me with more problems than I can handle. He knew if I worked on my own strength I would let go of His hand. So He held my hand tightly and never let me go.

So the journey, in making me a saint began.

You know what I have discovered about God? God will not allow me to take back what I have given Him.

Just like Him. He gives us so many gifts and He never takes it back.

I gave him my heart, in one of my spiritual high moments at the conference in 2009, and even told Him, I have a useless heart and I want to exchange it for His pure Heart.

So what did He do? He gave me His Heart.

This was when the war started. Here I am with my old sick heart wrestling with a pure heart of God in me.

Hebrew 13:5-6 says “ Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said , “ I will never leave you nor forsake you” and v6 encourages us to boldly say “ the Lord is my Helper; I will not fear. What can man do”

I realized that if I wanted to live the life He has promised me, I need to put to death all my old carnal attitudes, behaviors, reasoning's that had led me to where I was then.

I realized when I started putting the thinking cap of Jesus, the journey was not smooth at all. It was a real bumpy ride. The journey was a very painful one.

But with God’s strength I was determined to press on. Phil 3: 10 Paul says “ that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death”

What does this scripture mean to me?

Like Jesus I needed to suffer the pain when I deny the cravings of the flesh ( just not reacting or responding to anything that I thought was unfair).

In fellowship of His suffering (which is my suffering He took on the cross) I could offer it for His greater glory in making all things to come together for good.

What is that good?

To live the life He has called me to.

And for the conversion of my loved ones who still do not know who Jesus is.

And for my loved ones who know who Jesus is and are struggling just like me.

Being conformed to His Death, has become a true revelation in my life, everytime, I choose to put to death the flesh and its deceptive cravings to be acknowledged. To put to death the me, me, me, that constantly wants, wants, wants continuously to make the me, me, me, happy, loved, comforted, pitied, wanted, respected, noticed, recognized and to be provided.

I realized when I continuously kept my eyes on His death, and nailed every pain and sorrow and disappointments, every frustration on the cross, I could rise above all my pain and truly experience the power of His resurrection.

I received freedom. Everytime I said No to the flesh a little part of me died. My spiritman grew stronger.

Everytime I stop feeding the flesh, I grew in the spirit.

Now that I know by the grace of God, which He has so cleverly got me to embrace, His standard, in living the life in the spirit, I can now, boldly declare that indeed I am His saint.

As His saint, I have set my mind on things above, and not on things on the earth. Why do I say that? Read chapter 3 of colossians and you will discover how Paul has taught us to live a life in the spirit and put to death all idolatry and walk the love walk by keeping our mouth free from speaking in anger, wrath, malice and filthy language.

Even though there are many times I have fallen into my old ways, I know my God has pulled me out of the pit, and set me on the right track only stronger. As I said before, His hands never let me go.

How blessed I am to have such a merciful, loving God who never gets tired of me.

I believe, now that I have decided to walk the love walk even more deligently then I first started, my God will reward me in His time for He is a God who rewards those who diligently seek Him.

Therefore I will claim His promise for Abraham in Heb 6:14-15 “ Surely blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply you. And so, after he had patiently endured, he obtained his promise.”

I wish to bless you on this beautiful day of ALL SAINTS DAY and it is my prayer that you will set your heart on Him and seek Him diligently all the days of your life.

God Bless